How to Become an Ultima Online GM Employee: A Complete Guide

How to Become an Ultima Online GM Employee: A Complete Guide

Hey buddy! So, you wanna be a GM (Game Master) in Ultima Online? That’s like saying you wanna be a wizard but with way less robes and way more pixelated problems. Like, who doesn’t want to roam around in a digital world where spreadsheets and dragons meet? Let’s dive into this timeless quest of becoming an Ultima Online GM employee. Spoiler alert: there will be laughs along the way.

Step 1: Know What A GM Really Is
First things first, let’s figure out what a GM even does. It sounds fancy but it really just means you’re the adult in a room full of excited children. You get to boss around players, answer their silly questions, and make sure nobody turns their character into a giant potato… at least not without permission! Also, you gotta break up fights between players over who stole whose imaginary bread loaf. Yup, that’s your life now.

Step 2: Level Up Your Knowledge
You can’t just waltz in here like some kind of hero without knowing the game inside out. Play so much that your fingers start bleeding from clicking too much! You need to memorize what all the spells do and which critters drop the best loot. Remember that time you couldn’t find your sword? Yeah, that can’t happen as a GM!

Step 3: Embrace Your Inner Troll
Okay, now hear me out on this one. Being a GM means dealing with quirky characters all day long. Some folks will try to dupe you or tell you their pet hamster is their emotional support companion while adventuring as an elf warrior. Just roll with it dude! Don’t forget to throw in terrible puns about hamsters saving the day.

Step 4: Get Super Good at Customer Service
Imagine customer service but instead of dealing with angry folks on phones, it’s players screaming “I got killed by a goblin!” You gotta maintain your cool while typing back something supportive yet absurdly funny like “Well at least it wasn’t a rat!” So remember, stay calm and use lots of LOLs!

Step 5: Make Friends With Bugs
And no I don’t mean the creepy crawlies outside; I’m talking about software bugs! Sometimes players find weird glitches where they can fly or become invisible or whatever! As a GM, you’ll need to assure them that flying isn’t part of the game unless they pay extra for magic wings (just kidding). But get ready to report those bugs because they are as annoying as your aunt’s cat during Thanksgiving dinner.

Step 6: Keep Your Sense Of Humor Intact
If you’re gonna read reports of users blaming ninjas for stealing their loot or some crazy player insisting he saw Bigfoot in-game u better have thick skin & a sense of humor! Laughing helps keep that sanity badge intact – trust me!

Step 7: Build A Fortress of Support
You’re gonna need allies here because sometimes being alone is just sad and lonely like watching paint dry. Join forums and Discord servers – make friends who also love to modulate pixels & slay dragons together for hours during coffee breaks only during work hours right? So build rapport – everyone loves hearing about big-fish-tales concerning dragons!

FAQ Section

Question: Do I need to have super skills in coding?
Answer: Nah dude. Just knowing how to click buttons is enough most days! But learning some basic coding helps when things go haywire.

Question: Can I ban people for being annoying?
Answer: Sure thing! But try telling them nicely first… then when they’re still annoying just do what needs doing haha!

Question: Will I ever get paid for this?
Answer: You might get paid in gold coins… virtually speaking… unless you have another job too LULZ

Question: Do I have to wear wizard robes?
Answer: Only if that’s how you roll man – comfort over fashion right?

Question: What’s my biggest challenge as a GM?
Answer: Keeping straight faces when players claim they were abducted by aliens… ya know normal stuff.

Question: Can I transform into creatures like unicorns?
Answer: Only if your boss allows it – otherwise it’s just more paperwork for you buddy.

Question: What if someone hacks my account?
Answer: Then put on your secret superhero cape & save the day – cyber-style!

So there ya go buddy! Now you’ve got everything you need (or maybe don’t) to become an Ultima Online GM employee. Go out there and let the pixels guide ya—just don’t forget to pick up those imaginary loaves of bread along the way!